Current mood:

complacent

look at those gay men go
I still feel like there's something seriously wrong with this fic somewhere, but no one else seems to agree, so I'm giving up and posting it.
My life dream, or the closest to one that I have, is to 'Shop this story into a comic. Hey, it could happen.

Title: The War at Home
Author: custardpringle
Fandom/Pairing: Battlestar Galactica- Kara/Leoben
Spoilers: for "Occupation" through "Exodus pt.2," and vaguely for "Unfinished Business" and "Rapture."
Length: around 1000 words, but it felt bigger coming out.
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Written for onebedficathon, although I'm not sure it actually follows the challenge guidelines. Sigh. Thanks to the_antichris, shoemaster, and etben for looking it over.

Summary: "So tell me, Kara Thrace. Why is it so hard to let someone love you, once in a while?"

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The third time Leoben died, Kara discovered too late that she'd made trouble for herself as well; the force of her first blow had thrown him down against the couch, and now it was a bloody shredded mess with his corpse sprawled across it. Which was pretty damn satisfying to look at, but left her nowhere to sleep.

Well, not exactly nowhere. There was the living room floor, say, right next to Leoben's body.

And then-- okay, fine, there was the bedroom. With an actual bed, like Kara hadn't even seen in over a year-- and, just this once, no one else there sleeping in it. Then again, he'd be back and good as new in a few hours, and the Gods only knew what frakked-up ideas he'd get if he came back and found her in his bed.

There was the floor with a guaranteed dead toaster, and there was the bed with the chance of a live one who wanted in her pants.

Oh, hell, who was Kara kidding, anyway? She could use a good night's sleep for once. And she was a soldier, after all, one of the best. She'd wake up when he came in and be out of bed without him knowing a thing.

That simple.



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It occurred to Kara, too late, that the bed should smell of something, smell of Leoben; but if did, she couldn't tell. Either he didn't smell of anything or she'd been living with him long enough for it to be familiar, which was so creepily domestic it made her shudder.

The bed was big and comfortable, though (of course-- meant for two, after all) and she dropped off to sleep and dreamt

-- of explosions and screaming and death, everything burning down, mushroom clouds spreading across the surfaces of the worlds like some poisonous new kind of garden-- and at the end of it all, the biggest explosion of all, a star bursting into brilliant rings of color--

until an arm wrapped snugly around her waist, anchoring her, and someone was whispering soft soothing noises into her ear. Kara settled gratefully into the physical contact, relaxing back against the comfortingly living body pressed up behind her, and began to doze off again.

Then a kiss brushed over the back of her neck, dry and careful, but enough to jolt her back to reality.

"Frak!" Kara scrambled away and out of the bed, pressing her back against the wall and hunting for the light switch. "Don't you have any godsdamn shame?"

The light finally clicked on under her fingers, and sure enough, there he was-- sitting up, now, right next to the the indentation she herself had left. "Don't you understand yet, Kara?" Leoben had taken on that pointedly patient tone again, the one that said eventually you'll learn whether you want to or not. "There's never any shame in truth."

He was wearing a soft cloth shirt, almost like a t-shirt. Funny how Cylons apparently wore pajamas to bed, just like real people.

"And what truth is that?" she snapped back. "That you thought you'd catch a quick grope while I wasn't awake to stop you?"

"You were dreaming, weren't you?" It wasn't really a question. "I only wanted to take the dreams away for a little while." Leoben's usual confident smirk had melted off his face, and his voice was so convincingly soft that Kara actually caught herself believing, for a second, that he had really been concerned about her.

"The hell you did." It took an effort, but Kara kept her voice steady. "You're a machine, remember? You don't know the first frakking thing about dreams. Or love."

"And you're the expert?" Leoben's arms spread in a mockery of helplessness. "So tell me, Kara Thrace. Why is it so hard to let someone love you, once in a while?"

It took a moment for her to understand that, for once, he wasn't just talking about himself. "You bastard." Kara swallowed hard. Of all the frakking things. "You are not dragging him into this, okay?" She took a sideways step towards the door, then another, keeping her back against the wall.

At the same instant, Leoben swung his legs out of the bed-- jarringly barefoot-- and took two steps towards her. "So you're running away." It wasn't a question, but he still looked absolutely serious.

Kara could almost've thought he was being open with her for once. But she knew better, so she offered him the smirk she knew he was wearing on the inside. "Only from you."

Leoben didn't hear her, or chose not to. He was good at that. "I know you're frightened, Kara." He took one more step, only just bringing them within arm's reach of each other. "But you've been given such beautiful gifts. Such a wonderful destiny, and to be loved so powerfully-- my task is to make sure you understand that."

Kara glared back up at him and shook her head. "You'll excuse me if I don't just take your word for it."

"You will, one day." Leoben's fingers were calloused but gentle against her cheekbone, and Kara's fists clenched at her sides.

Just let him get a bit closer. Just a bit--

"Come back to bed," Leoben offered. Like it wasn't what he'd been gunning for all along.

"Like hell." Kara clenched her jaw, and his fingers fell away.

"Only to sleep, I promise you." Leoben was smiling again, but it looked almost sad. He was getting better at this pretending thing. "You know I wouldn't hurt you, Kara. And you know I can help keep the dreams away."

And the frakked-up thing was, he was right, and the Gods knew Kara hated when that happened.

She grinned up at Leoben and shook her head, ducking under his arm to the doorway. "Good night, Leoben."

She still caught a glimpse of his sudden bright grin as she left, and it took her a moment to realize why: she'd addressed him by his actual name. Frak.

The body was gone from the couch, but it was still a bloody wreck, and Kara ended up sleeping on the floor after all. It was cold and hard, and she dreamt of death and supernovae until morning.




END

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